L’amore

You can blame Abbea, Shannon and Stephanie if you want. Abbea had been trying to hook us up for a long time. I wasn’t interested and I kind of doubt Ben was, either. Shannon had known Ben for decades and had introduced us a couple of times. Eventually, through random circumstances (read living in a minuscule town with nothing to do) we ended up hanging out together a lot. It was harmless group activity kind of hanging out. I thought he was funny. He thought I was pretty. It worked.

Then one day fall break rolled around and all of our friends left town. Ben’s car broke down. He was working at Burnett Research (tele-surveying company), and i was looking for a job. I offered to take him job hunting with me. He found a job as a CNA at a nursing home and I started working at the poster store in the mall. He got his car fixed and I wrecked mine. From there on in, he started taking me to or from work when I didn’t want to walk, we started running errands together and “studying” together. In my defense, he was actually helping me understand the texts I was reading for Lordship. I think I paid for the food a couple of times, and that’s probably his excuse for choosing me as a studying buddy. On Thursdays we’d meet friends to go swing dancing. Ben always smelled really good. One day I found myself especially disappointed when he had to cancel some plans we had. That was my red flag. Uh, oh. I liked him! I consulted Stephanie. I remember the talk. It went something like:

Me: I think I like him more then a friend.
Her: Really? Why?
Me: I’m really bummed I won’t see him tonight. More then just bummed. I’m a bit sad.
Her: Is it that time of the month?
Me: No!
Her: I had to ask. Ok, so is it bad that you like him more?
Me: It is if he doesn’t like me that way.
Her: Why?
Me: Because I don’t want to be that stupid. It would be a waste of time.
Her: Does he like you?
Me: I don’t know.
Her: Ask him.
Me: What!?!
Her: Just ask. He’ll probably appreciate your honesty.
Me: Or it’ll scare him half to death.
Her: Either way, you’ll know.

Anyways, so the next night we’re sitting at Dennys. He’s eating Eggs Over My Hammy and I’m snacking on fries. I put my book down. He asked if I was alright. I said yeah, but in a tone that he would know that we weren’t finished talking yet. I told him that I liked him and that I was going to have to stop seeing him so much until I got over it. He said, “ok.” ….as you can imagine, Steph got an earful that night.

The next day, he asked if I wanted to study at Dennys again that night. I said ok. I figured if he didn’t have something to say, then I would genuinely cut bait. So there we were. Sitting at Dennys again. Over fries and hot chocolate. He kept spacing out over his book. My turn. I asked if he was alright. He said he had a problem, because he’d like to be more, but he was still in school and couldn’t do anything about it. I was confused. “Are you talking about us?” I asked.  “Oh! yes. Sorry.” I had a smile the size of Texas on my face that nothing in this world could wipe off. I got my first kiss on November 10th, 2001. We were married July 17th, 2004.

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